Everyone says that having a baby changes everything in your life and they are right. But I didn’t think it would literally change everything. I thought of a few things that I wish I would have really contemplated before having a child. I don’t know if anyone else feels or thinks these, but this is what I have experienced:
1)
It will be very rare to get a full night
of sleep for at least 6 months. When Adalynn was 7 weeks old, she
slept 12 hours, 14 nights in a row!! I thought we were the lucky parents that
had a good sleeper. Then she got her
shots - and she hasn’t slept through the night consistently since. I knew I loved my sleep and never thought I
could function without my 9-10 hours per night.
But, your body adjusts somehow and you keep going!
2)
You will constantly worry about your
child’s safety. We leave for Hawaii in a couple of days and we are
not bringing Adalynn. Grandma’s will be
taking care of her and I know they will do a great job. But I still worry - what if she gets
sick? What if one of the grandmas get
into a car accident with Addy in the back?
What if she has an allergic reaction to bug bites or something
else? There is always the constant
question in the back of my mind- when should I bring her to the doctor?
3)
You have to keep a nightly routine. I pick Adalynn up from daycare at 5, we go
for a walk, home by 5:45, try baby food by 6, play until 7, read the same 3
books until 7:15, bottle, then bed by 7:30-7:45. After that, my husband and I can finally
eat. I totally understand how parents have
pizza every night or grab something quick from Mcdonalds and eat it on the way
home.
4)
A long weekend or weekend getaway has a
totally new meaning. During
the summer we have something going on every.single.weekend. When preparing to go somewhere, it’s like
having a suitcase for the day. Diapers,
food, couple of outfits, toys, blanket, stroller, etc. If we are going somewhere, I make sure we are
there for the day so it’s worth all the work of getting things together.
5)
You will constantly compare your child to
your family or friends’ child.
Whenever Adalynn reaches a milestone, I think of when my nephew did, or
a friends’ child did. I can’t help it -
I just want to make sure she is developing at the rate she should - even though
all babies are different.
6)
You will want or need to be home early on
the weekends. Sunday nights
are hard. Adalynn is usually way
overtired from all the activities we did over the weekend and she doesn’t
usually go to bed at her normal time on the weekend nights - especially
Saturday nights. I wish I could have her
to bed at the same time every night of the week - but we need a social life
too.
7)
You may have a hard time balancing work,
parenthood and life. It is really hard to balance all three. The month of August is especially crazy this
year - Adalynn will be at her normal daycare for like 12 days total all month.
The last week in August, Adalynn will be with 3 different caretakers. I don’t like taking off work - I have
deadlines to meet, projects to complete, etc.
Adalynn is almost 7 months and some days I look at her in amazement and
think of all the progress she has made over the last 2-3 months. She is crawling, can stand on her own (using me
and my husband as her jungle gym, not lifting herself to the couch, end tables
etc. yet) . I’m happy to be part of
those milestones and some days I wish I could be with her all day to help her
develop even more of those skills. I
could stay home - we would be fine financially, but wouldn’t be able to live
the same lifestyle we do now. But
emotionally I don’t think I could do it.
I yearn for adult conversation and really enjoy feeling a sense of
accomplishment.
8)
You will be bringing your child with
everywhere. If my husband is
gone on a fishing/hunting trip or has softball on the weekends and he isn’t
home - it’s just me and Addy. If I want
to go to Walmart I think twice about it and think “Is it really worth the time
and work to bring Addy and her stuff?”
I usually end up waiting until Jerrick gets home or have him stop for
me. If I want to leave town to go
shopping I usually end up asking my
mother-in-law to watch Addy because it is very difficult shopping with
a baby all day.
9)
Having a child will be the best thing
that has ever happened to you. It is so easy to get discouraged
when your baby won’t stop crying, won’t eat, won’t sleep, etc. I have questioned my ability as a parent many
times. But I am also learning about
myself.
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I’ve learned that I don’t have near enough
patience as I probably should with a crying baby. I reach my breaking point after about 25-30
minutes of Adalynn crying and need help from Jerrick.
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I don’t need to take anyone’s advice. I gladly accept it, but (for example) I know
letting Adalynn ‘cry it out’ doesn’t feel right and I will do things to prevent
her from crying for long periods.
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I always put Adalynn first - doesn’t matter if I
am starving, tired, whatever… her needs always come first and I never resent
that.
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My 3 favorite parts of the work week: When Addy
sees me in the morning, her body goes wild with excitement - legs and arms
flailing all over the place and a huge smile; picking her up from daycare -
same reaction as the morning; and night time cuddles when she falls asleep in
my arms before putting her in her crib.
Some nights I cry with her in my arms because I feel this overwhelming
sense of pride and love for her.
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Lastly, I have learned that no one is perfect
and it’s impossible to do everything right.
You have to raise your child to know the different between right and
wrong and to follow your heart with whatever feels right and pray for guidance,
patience and comfort in knowing God has chosen you to take care of you little
one.
Adalynn being a big girl and standing up with a little support!
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